How Facebook can lose you as many gigs as it gets you

Burning bridges is much easier than you think!
Burning bridges is much easier than you think!

Facebook is a powerful tool. Moreover, there are a lot of less powerful tools, morons, douchebags, bitches and fucktards that use it every day.  This makes it a very dangerous place for expression when around every popular or hot button post lies someone ready to comment in a way that sets you off.  Comedians have been using facebook to promote since the real death of Myspace back in 2007-2008.  This blog is not about how to promote on facebook, but the ways you can burn bridges with booking agents and fellow comics by not be cautious about your new open social connection to said people.

Facebook Messaging for Business

More and more comedians are booking themselves using facebook.  Most often you never have a real conversation with the person on the other end when doing so. When we connect with other comedians or booking agents we must be concerned not only about the interpretation of the text we send them, but the ferocity of our possibly misconstrued comments and posts on our own facebook feed and on that of our friends.

Facebook Political Failure

I can’t resist commenting to a political viewpoint I don’t agree with on facebook.  It’s an addiction, I’ll admit it.  Even worse, I often post trolling comments on my on wall to rope in people that don’t believe I actually feel this way.  I have come to accept that it is a behavior I derive enough enjoyment from that I am willing to risk losing connections/friends/possible gigs by continuing this idiotic pursuit.  It just makes me so fucking happy to set people OFF sometimes!  Likely due to some issue from my childhood relating to control, but whatever.  My suggestion to you is simply to be aware.

Facebook Potty Mouth

If you are looking to get some work that requires you be clean and you have connected with a clean booking person, maybe you shouldn’t post a status like “I don’t give a fuck about the royal baby”.  Not only is that new connection going to possibly see it, but if someone you are connected with comments on it and they are connected with another clean booker, you likely have just planted the seed in their minds that you are randomly going to say “Fuck” in the middle of the clean corporate gig they make $400 a pop from (hence losing them the gig and income).  You think I am fucking with you, but I know this happens.  Bookers are bored and surfing facebook just like we do, and occasionally they read your stupid shit and form personal opinions that linger in the back of their mind when going to choose whether to put you on a show.  Even worse?  They read your blogs on your web sites like this one and form a bias for that and many other reasons.  (Please note: If you are a booker that does this, thanks for reading, but you can go FUCK YOURSELF AND YOUR SHITTY ONE SHOW).

Facebook Messaging Fail

Don’t respond to major business facebook messages when you are in a hurry.  Recently I was came across someone that I knew once booked shows and in my mind I kept thinking ‘Man, she is a bitch, I wonder if that bitch still books show?’. Why did I feel she was such a bitch?  Well, because in MY mind, I had a very short and abrupt conversation with her that made me feel I was being written off.  After going back in my messages with her I realized I had ignored HER last message to ME, then sent her a messsage asking for gigs like a year later. NOW WHO IS THE ASSHOLE?  You guessed it, fucking me.  If you are going to use facebook messaging for business, you are going to have to set up some type of spreadsheet, document or follow up reminder to let you know when a message has been close out, OR what the last result was and what action is needed.  I can EASILY attribute 15% of my lost gigs to using facebook messaging and either not seeing the other persons message, OR responding on the go with a one sentence reply that came off as super shitty when I reviewed it later.

Facebook Forgetfulness

Oh shit is this a big one.  Moreso because of how fucking embarassing it is, but also to show you that ignorance is really easy to accidentally achieve.  When you connect with someone on facebook, make some type of log if they are a business contact. Create a special group or even send them a message asking for their other contact info for future communications so you can add them to a contact management program.  On several occasions I have made a snide comment on a persons facebook post because I FORGOT WHO THE FUCK THEY ACTUALLY WERE.  Yeah, makes me a cunt, don’t be a cunt.  If you choose to use facebook for business, REMEMBER WHO MATTERS.

Stop Faceboook Ass Kissing

You don’t have to support and like everything that a booker/agent posts.  In fact, don’t fucking do that.  They notice and the ones with half a brain (1/3 of them) realize you are cyber-kissing their asses.  Unless you find what they have to say truly agreeable, don’t just share, like and comment with “You are so right!”  It makes you look like a mindless drone.  However, as the math before this indicates, 2/3 of the bookers/agents out there LOVE THIS SHIT. They also are horrible to work for.

 

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Matt Ward is a comedian and comedy show producer living in Knoxville, Tennessee. He is a co-producer of the Cape Fear Comedy Festival, and sole producer of The Rocky Top Comedy Contest and Port City’s Top Comic.  He also is the driving force behind KnoxComedy.com.

 

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